Older newlyweds

I am delighted that Paul is finally married. Two years ago people were beginning to think that we were a couple.

Linda and Paul will be the first to admit that they are not youngsters just setting out on the road to adulthood, so it’s fair to say that they both must have some history. Because of this, I took the opportunity to place an advert in the local newspaper. It read as follows: ‘Notice to the ladies of Wimborne. Former bachelor extraordinaire, Paul Wilson, of 14 Lethingham Road, is getting married on 27th March 2002 to Linda Thompson. Would those of you still with keys to his house kindly return them prior to the marriage. If you would like to add a message wishing him well, please do so’. And here is what it produced. [Pull out big bag of keys, then pull out a key with a nice thong attached to it, then pull out a key with handcuffs attached to it with a note saying “you can have these but I am keeping the whip” and finally pull out a pair of men’s underpants].