Amusing friendship reminisces

Paul is one of the most exciting people to be with. I remember the time with the… oh no Paul wasn’t there. But when we all managed to sneak into… no, he wasn’t there for that either. But that hilarious time we… no, Paul went home early that night. [Pause] Paul is one of the kindest people to be with…

My abiding memory of Harry is his ability to create anecdotes just through his very existence. It all started when we were friends in the playground aged three. According to my mum, Harry and I were on a seesaw just faffing around, when he suddenly jumped up high and sent me crashing down hard. When my side of the seesaw hit the ground, I let out a squeaky trump. Harry thought this was so amusing he started to do a little wee. And, being at the top of the see saw, his urine obeyed the laws of gravity and travelled down to me. Yes ladies and gentlemen, Harry thought my fart was so funny he somehow wet both our pants.

They say a friend is like a book; you don't need to read all of them, just the best ones. This certainly applies to me and Oliver, as he's pretty much the only true friend I've ever had. I tried having other friends in high school and college, but I never got past the first chapter. With Oliver, I've continued writing new pages ever since we met. Which reminds me, remember when we drew all those naked women in that Bible at harvest festival one year? Sorry Reverend Johnson.