Humorous take on bride & grooms relationship

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  1. To keep this wedding contemporary, the couple will have their first dance a little later, then around an hour after that we’ll all gather round to watch them have their first marital argument. I’m not sure what’s it’s going to be over yet, but Paul will definitely be in the wrong.

  2. Apparently, it's been plain sailing for these two so far, as they've not had a single falling out throughout their entire relationship. Cara's in for a treat though when Graham does fancy a tiff, because he prefers to engage in tantric arguments; short, subtle disagreements which gradually build to a dramatic crescendo at the end of the day. You know, like Sting does.

  3. I'm not sure Heather's ever seen Ted in his former role as a fat bastard, because right now he's in a transitionary period. We call it the slim fat cycle. Every few years he'll balloon up, get depressed, then go on an ultra-strict diet and drop back down. I'm not saying this will definitely happen now he's married, but when I purchased his and hers silk robes as a wedding gift, I got his in XXXL.